Sunday, May 15, 2016

Letter #55

May 3rd 

We will start with the good first, that's always a good way to start!

We saw Drew and Renee! She is soo golden, they were telling us that they met with her church to see if it was a path that they should take and I guess they really didn't like it, but when we came over she said she just felt so good and happy! The spirit of course! :) So we went and taught the Plan of Salvation, that was cool because Drew who is less active had tears in his eyes the whole time, the spirit was soooo strong, that is something I will miss, and something I love so much,  it is teaching people about the joys of the gospel and instantly seeing them feel that same joy! We committed Renee to baptism and she said she would pray about it! YES! We see her today, I'm excited! 
Then super cool, so back to Sunday, we cover two wards and when we have ward council with both we are at the church at 7:30 and don't leave till 4:00. I love it, but I am also starving after, so I always pack half the fridge in my bag on those days. Well a member noticed and he said he'd hook us up! Whatever that means! haha Then  wed. he called us and told us to meet at this other members house, we pull up and he told us to pull up our car...we were so confused and then he put all this food in our trunk! 

Oh man how sweet was that?!


Guess who I got to see on Friday?!!!

ahhh I was more excited to see them than when I saw Paul McCartney! yup! And I mean that with every fiber of my being! these boys, ah, I KNOW I knew them, and I KNOW I promised them that I would help them! I love them!  Things are going so much better. Not all gone, but better. I feel like that is how Heavenly Father works in our life..... that we go through a insanely hard time, and then he HELPS lift the burden, doesn't take it 100% away, but lifts it so we can grow!

We also saw a newer investigator, Rose, that day! She is so sweet, but has a really hard life! Really hard! But she is progressing well!

So Saturday we found out that , Sister Kelso left me and I was really sad! She helped me a lot and put up with me a lot. I will miss her a ton! 

I have been having a really hard time. I feel like I am at a constant tug of war with my brain. One day I'm happy, the next I just have to pull my self along. It has gotten a lot more frequent... I don't know whats wrong and honestly I feel like I can't turn to President Miller for help which is so hard because I feel like he is someone I should be able to reach out to. I just ugh...  I called him yesterday finally asking for help, which was sooo hard for me! He told me I need to start looking on the out side! jsalghaljha;sga

But I need help! I don't know whats wrong with me and I don't know what to do!!!! There are times we are at members house and I just want to lay on the couch and stay there forever, I want to go home early beacuase I feel like I can't keep pulling myself.

So anyways, President is having me go talk to some guy in family services next Tuesday.. I hope this helps.... 

The Elders came over and gave me a blessing, it was really good, and it helps, but sometimes I feel like only a few days later the spirit of that blessing fades...

but this was a good one so lets hope it'll last me till next Tuesday... 

I want to get over this, I want to just be happy! But its hard...

I pray daily and I am beyond grateful for prayer, I can just talk to my Heavenly Father, council and plea for help!

I love you!  And no I don't want to go home and I don't want that to have to be something that happens! I love this mission way too much! It has changed me more than anything else ever could!

Love you,

Love Sister Markus

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